Redefining Motherhood: Nikkya Hargrove on Love, Loss, and Identity
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Join us for an inspiring event with Nikkya Hargrove, author of Mama, a powerful memoir about her journey as a young Black queer woman who adopts her baby brother after their mother's death. Nikkya shares her experiences with motherhood, identity, and resilience in the face of generational trauma. In conversation with librarian and queer history advocate Shawn Smith-Cruz, this event promises a moving discussion on family, community, and determination. Don't miss it!
In this searing and uplifting memoir, a young Black queer woman fresh out of college adopts her baby brother after their incarcerated mother dies, determined to create the kind of family she never had.
Nikkya Hargrove spent a good portion of her childhood in prison visiting rooms. When her mother—addicted to cocaine and just out of prison—had a son and then died only a few months later, Nikkya was faced with an impossible choice. Although she had just graduated from college, she decided to fight for custody of her half brother, Jonathan. And fight she did.
Nikkya vividly recounts how she is subjected to preconceived notions that she, a Black queer young woman, cannot be given such responsibility. Her honest portrayal of the shame she feels accepting food stamps, her family’s reaction to her coming out, and the joy she experiences when she meets the woman who will become her wife reveal her sheer determination. And whether she’s clashing with Jonathan’s biological father or battling for Jonathan’s education rights after he’s diagnosed with ADHD and autism, this is a woman who won’t give up.
Nikkya’s moving story picks up where Bryan Stevenson’s Just Mercy left off, exploring generational trauma and pulling back the curtain on family court and poverty in America. Mama is an ode to motherhood and identity, and to finding strength in family and community, for readers of memoirs by Ashley C. Ford, Natasha Tretheway, and Dawn Turner.
Nikkya Hargrove is a graduate of Bard College and currently serves as a member of the school's Board of Governors and chair of the alumni/ae Diversity Committee. A LAMBDA Literary Nonfiction Fellow, she has written about adoption, marriage, motherhood, and the prison system for The Washington Post, The Guardian, The New York Times, Scary Mommy, and Shondaland. She has worked for social impact nonprofits providing support to underserved communities throughout her professional career. She lives in Connecticut with her wife and three children.
Shawn(ta) Smith-Cruz is a lesbian librarian working in academic libraries, and teaching grad students how to become librarians. Her 2024 co-edited publications called Grabbing Tea are on Queer Conversations in Libraries (Vol 1) and Queer Conversations in Archives (Vol 2), published by Litwin Books. Shawn has an MFA in Fiction and an MLS with a focus in Archiving, each from Queens College. She is an associate dean for Teaching, Learning, and Engagement at NYU Libraries, an adjunct assistant professor at Pratt School of Information, and a co-coordinating volunteer archivist at the Lesbian Herstory Archives. Shawn also co-curates symposia and conferences such as the Gender and Sexuality Information Studies Colloquium, the Critical Pedagogy Symposium, and Case Studies in Critical Pedagogy series. Most recently Shawn co-coordinated the Fridays in May: Queer BIPOC Peer-Networking Program for early career queer librarians and students of color. Though she works in NYC, Shawn lives with her wife, daughter, two cats, a small one-eyed dog, a betta fish, and a snail named Raisin in Norwalk, CT. You can read some of her writings or learn more about Shawn's work at shawntasmithcruz.com.
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